Equal Opportunity

Have you ever had an idea, a shear "stroke of genius" that at the time of conception just felt like the greatest idea ever? Then, after its been given some thought, you come to the realization that it's possibly the stupidest idea ever. I like to call these happenings "phantom eureka moments." I'm currently doing a cost benefit analysis of getting a tattoo. I want something artsy and pretentious, like script from some obscure piece of literature, only because I want to be "that guy", the guy who uses air quotes and talks about indie art house films and subterranean bands. I say subterranean because even the underground artists haven't heard of the bands he's talking about. The more and more I think about it, I just don't think I have something that means enough to me to have it permanently on my body. I can already tell that there will definitely be some buyer's remorse, and unfortunately there is no return policy.

On an aside, I think I've decided to pitch an idea for the newspaper. It'd be a great way to gather contacts and have some published work. Always have to be thinking about your future kids. I'll divulge the details when I work out all of the logistics and what not.

Also, I've been rather nostalgic lately. Be ready for some sappy, emotional bullshit soon.

Currently Playing: John Mayer- I'm Gonna Find Another You (Live in Los Angeles)

Warning Sign

So I had an in-depth conversation with my manager at work. We discussed a number of things, but the biggest thing happened to center around people, and more importantly how I interact with people. When it comes to friends, I'm very particular. Now, you can call me an asshole, a prick, what have you, but when it comes to my friends, I don't put up with a lot. I know how I want them to act, and if they don't meet that standard then I don't want anything to do with them. It's no different than if someone were trying to find a girlfriend/boyfriend. There is a certain criteria that is used to weigh all suitors, and if you don't meet all the criteria then you're out. I have learned that you can never settle, whether it comes to a significant other or friends.

I've always found friends to be more important than having a girlfriend, and I still believe that to this day. Not saying that having a girlfriend is overrated, but friends can offer an insight that your "ol lady" can't, or should I say, is not willing to give. There is nothing wrong with that, I just feel like a good relationship with your friends is a little more honest. That being said, I have a lot of issues, especially when it comes to trust. There are aspects of my life that I tend to share with most everyone, even some pretty sensitive material. I find it rare that I share exactly what I'm thinking with people though. In the past year, I've met a handful of people that I feel 100% comfortable with, and if you have to wonder who that is, chances are you are not one of those people.

I've had my fair share of friends that, while they are interesting enough, just don't stimulate me in the way I'd like to be stimulated (That's what she said!) . I have pet peeves, and I'll admit I'm not very forgiving when it comes to those pet peeves. This may be shallow, but at least I know what I like and what I don't like. Intelligence is something that I value to no end, but so is tact. I don't care if you know all of the capitals on this planet, don't be a d-bag about how smart you are. I have intelligent friends that show it in subtle ways, and that's why I like being around them.

I have one friend who may be the most unassuming person on this planet. He is both smart and funny, but very humble and accommodating. He has respect for pretty much everything, and I can only hope to learn to be more like him. No homo.

I guess the reason why I decided to write this is because there are certain aspects of my life that I need to work on. I need to be a little more accepting and a little less cold. The only thing I can say is that I will not settle just to have a ton of friends. I like to talk, and I like to talk to people that are interesting and fun to be around.

That's not too much to ask, is it?

Guys and Dolls

I've always heard that a guy can't be best friends without a girl. That there are ulterior motives, that he is just trying to get in her pants, trying to get with her, what have you. While this may not hold true for every guy, I honestly believe that for a majority of guys, the reason you become close with a girl is to 1) try to date her, or 2) try to fuck her. Now, there is some middle ground here and you can end up becoming close with someone without satisfying either of those criteria.

I can only speak from experience, but every time I've ever been close to a girl, it was because we either dated, I had feelings for her, or there was something more carnal going on there. I naturally get along better with girls for some strange reason, but I'm not overly feminine or desperate. Maybe it's just me, maybe I just have a problem. Every time I become interested in a girl I'm immediately relegated to the friend zone, save for one time. We won't go into that. Now, I've talked to my share of girls, but the ones I truly find interesting and worth my time either 1) don't have the time for me or 2) already have someone waiting out in the wings. This is when i curse my bad luck and just suck it up.

One day I'm going to figure this whole dating thing out, and hopefully I can have close female friends that I don't want to date or fuck. Not that there is anything wrong with that, because I hang out with some pretty good looking ladies. The one time that it actually worked out for me, it ended up being a beautiful disaster. But like I said earlier, we won't go into that.

That's a story for another day.